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  • Romance Scams: Tales from the Crypto: “Pig Butchering” & Education to Empower You With Truth in Our Evolving Digital Age

    I have always done well with money matters in my life. I have ‘sold to eat’ my entire adult working career in some form or fashion, making a good income, and providing well for my family. 

    This is a story of how prevalent online scams are and a cautionary tale of sorts. A story of a bad situation getting worse. The story of how all of my financial assets were wiped out by what is now called a “pig butchering” scam. 

    Now, before I continue, I will tell you that I am recovering from the financial and emotional trauma that this is caused in my life, and I am building back a better future for myself. Do not feel sorry for what happened to me as I am here to be a beacon of hope and empowerment for making sure that I bring awareness through what I went through so that someone that you know, even yourself, does not fall victim like I did.

    Basically, a scammer finds a pig, fattens it up, and butchers it at harvest time when it is fat enough. I have wanted to write this story for a while but was too embarrassed and ashamed that I fell for such a scam seeing that I am both technologically savvy as well as smart with finances. Now I realize how romance scams and other scams that revolve around potential financial gain are very common in our modern day so writing, this article is part of my healing process and letting go of the trauma that all of this that I went through caused in every single area of my life.

    Hopefully, what I am writing here will protect your or someone you know and love, perhaps a friend, spouse, or family member. The moral of the story is that there are a lot of evil people in the world and, if given an in-road, they will take all you have… and then some.

    I met someone Tinder who got me into joining a cryptocurrency platform that specialized in future trading. The platform looked very legit and even had its own app, but you had a side load it and that was the first time I’ve ever downloaded an app that was not from the Apple or Google Play App Store. As I will discuss as this article progresses, which you don’t know CAN hurt you more often than not, especially and respect to the Digital realm that we are in which is ever evolving.

    Now, a note here. Cryptocurrency isn’t “evil” by any means as many people believe. It’s just another form of money exchange. Money is energy and has no inherent good or bad properties. It is only in the hands of the user that it becomes a force for good or evil. That’s my opinion. 

    Cryptocurrency of any form is just digital or virtual currency sent through digital blockchains and provides a great way to send funds peer-to-peer, kind of like some of the peer-to-peer monetary platforms like PayPal, Venmo, Zelle, or CashApp that you might be familiar with in our modern day of smartphones and mobile technology. Bitcoin was the first cryptocurrency that really took off and that started around 2009 and has been evolving ever since.

    These services are common, and cryptocurrency works much the same way and is a secure way to send money and it is also growing in popularity. Blockchain technology, which cryptocurrency runs on, is also very secure and reliable, and dependent on several different factors to confirm a transaction. Basically, this all acts as an exchange of monetary value between two people.

    Much like you can trade ‘futures’ in the stock market, which is done every day the market is open, you can buy a speculative position on what you think the price of a cryptocurrency will be after a certain period of time and you can do the same thing in the crypto markets. The difference is that the crypto market is always open for business, 24/7, 365 days a year. In other words, crypto never sleeps. Since it is all digital and worldwide, it never needs to sleep. An investor can buy contracts and focus on buying low and selling high on a contracted and even leveraged positions in the market.

    Speculative futures trading of any kind is a risky proposition, but the reward is very lucrative.

    I started out with small investments and had guidance with every trade. I was only in the market with an active trade once a day, not every day, even, and I amassed a fortune in the now defunct DIEM coin, (AKA Libra Coin) that Facebook/Meta pioneered. At the time, there is not much information about cryptocurrency, scams or romance scams, or pig butchering, scams or anything like that

    The profits I was making got me hooked. Trading futures is addictive and many ruined day traders in the traditional stock market will tell you it becomes kind of like a gambling vice. You get hooked on winning. 

    Essentially you buy long or sell short, selling your position when you’ve made a profit. The more volatility, usually the better the market to trade in. But Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies fluctuate in value like a rollercoaster, and at a very fast pace as well, I might add. Remember, the market never sleeps. 

    I did very well (better than good) in this venture. The dream of making extra money so I could purchase my wife at the time a newer truck and do other things we needed as a family, was becoming a reality. 

    The nightmare began when I tried to withdraw my funds and transfer it into cash value through a crypto exchange.

    There were risk reserve fees, taxes, and other related expenses this platform was asking for before they would release my money and it couldn’t be paid out of the funds I had in the account, they all had to be external transfers, from outside of the account, that I added to the account. As it turned out, the platform and person who got me into it, were both scammers.

    I started taking out loans to cover these expenses from banks and borrowing from friends. 

    I even talked directly to the financial head of the scam platform to which I paid more money to in the trust of recovering my funds but he ended up taking my money and running away with it. I was left with nothing when it was all over.

    I finally hired a recovery firm but they needed even more money, and managed to go after the scoundrels running this platform, but that turned out to be a scam too. A “recovery scam“ something else that you need to be aware of. If you lost money from a cryptocurrency scam, I have the resources of real people in real law firms that actually handle recovery that are based here in the United States and the firm that I am working with is based right here in Texas nearby where I live. I will discuss this further a little bit later in this article.

    The stress from the situation cost me my job and my marriage of 20 years on top of it, among many other things. A sad state of affairs. 

    There’s more to all of this but I will spare you all the gory details. I know many people would have done unthinkable things to find a way out of the mess I got into, but God made me strong in my empowering resilience. On the other side of being through a gauntlet of evil scammers, the people running this platform, I have some life experience takeaways from this experience: 

    • Never trust someone you don’t personally know or, especially, that befriends you in social media or poses to be one of your old friends. That’s super hot woman who sent you a DM on Instagram or Facebook or TikTok or Snapchat could be some Nigerian scammer just trying get you to send them some bitcoin. Extremely attractive women or guys usually don’t have a real need to reach out to desperate and lonely men or women otherwise. Do not engage with text messages of people who act like they received the wrong phone number. They are likely a human trafficking victim that has an organized crime ring behind them and are trapped in a hotel somewhere in Cambodia. If you don’t believe me, keyword search “pig butchering scams“ on YouTube or watch this playlist, which was compiled by a law firm out of Houston that I am working with right now, in part to advocate for awareness and support for victims of scams like this:

    • Money and new relationships of any kind don’t mix. Especially those founded online. Do not under any circumstances send any money to somebody who you have not met in person or at least had a video or photo verification with and there are a lot of games played these days with impersonation of social media influencers and “deep fake” AI technology. 

    This has evolved over time but the nice thing that’s also evolved is reverse image search technology, and other platforms that search online databases and dating profiles for people who are trying to “catfish” unsuspecting victims. Don’t be afraid to call bullshit on somebody. If they are real, they should have nothing to hide. If they are not, well, then you have your answer. People who are trying to catfish people on dating apps or elsewhere will hide things from you to keep you in love with them. If you are naïve or blind to what’s going on, it can cost you more than you expected. As the old saying goes, “If it cost you your piece, it’s too expensive”. Do not, under any circumstances, compromise your peace to try to make somebody else happy or satisfied. Take care of yourself first and look out for the only person that matters in your life when everything else is gone, and that is yourself.

    • A very formative figure from ancient times was recorded as saying the following: “Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it…” Never invest more than you can lose in any investing strategy. Ever… if you can’t lose it, don’t play with fire or you’re going to get burned. The folks out there who play with poisonous “snakes” eventually get bit at some point.

    • King Solomon once wrote the following in a rather popular book:“A faithful person will be richly blessed, but one eager to get rich will not go unpunished.” How true that statement is in my life.

    • Stay away from investments and platforms you can’t explain to a 5th grader. If you can’t explain it, it isn’t worth your time or risking your hard earned money.

    • As the TLC song from the 1990’s chorus goes, “Don’t go chasing waterfalls. Stay next to the rivers and the lakes that you’re used to.” All that glitters isn’t gold. Especially when it relates to online relationships and “ great opportunities to make money” of any kind. Don’t fall for that shit.

    • I have often quoted Mike Tyson’s famous quote which I will paraphrase here: “Everyone has a plan… Until you get punched in the face.” Life has ways of punching you in the face, sometimes over and over again, until you learn the lesson that is meant for you. Are you learning that lesson? If you’re not, then reflect on any and all of your past hardships… there’s a lesson in every situation. You can learn this the easy way or the hard way. That is your choice.

    This situation made me a hardened survivor of a very difficult trial. Faith and trust in a Higher Power wins every time. You can survive anything if you have hope and healthy coping mechanisms in place. 

    Life is not easy. I would also say that my life has been harder than most so far. The last three years have been a proverbial living hell through the many hardships however, but I’ve decided to become a victor, not a victim. Remember, we become empowered to be a blessing to others through our struggles. This is part of that process for me.

    So, I did stupid with zeros on the end. So, I trusted where I shouldn’t have. Lessons were learned and I have moved forward with a new life in Grace and Peace – a life filled with wisdom and a deeper understanding of God’s love and mercy.  Never forget that no matter how bad things are in your life, the sun comes out tomorrow and that every day is a day that you could make it better than the last one. That resilience and faith in my endurance and in a higher power is what brought me through all this.Never forget that you are not alone. Remember, Darkness and evil cannot hide where there is Light.  

     Get you an accountability partner if you don’t already have one. Tell someone about what you were getting ready to do before you do it and get some insight because as a wise book once said, “in the multitude of council, there is safety“.

    This is one of the most valuable lessons I have learned in going through what did. Many fellow scam-victims would have taken their own life over what I went through. In fact, I would argue that 95% of people would not have made it as far as I have on the other side of this and survived any of this.

    I have become a “sheepdog” for other emotionally compromised men and women who have fallen victim or potentially can’t fall victim to things like this. I didn’t even realize what I was going through and the sophistication of it was being done by the Chinese mafia, and the person that was scamming me initially was likely a human trafficking victim themselves.  

    I stayed in faith and beat the odds, though the deck was stacked heavily against me, so to speak.

    I am still standing strong in God’s love. I will never forget the blessings and grace God showed me through this bleak and hopeless situation that lasted almost two years until I recovered my funds with legal help and during that process my lawyer was trailed by the people who scammed me and almost shot to death. Thank God for his safety and God’s protection on his life as well.

    Never forget that God created all of the hills and valleys in this experience we call life. If God created time itself and willed your soul into existence into this Earthly realm, God certainly has a plan for your journey. It just may not have unfolded all of the way yet. The point here is to never give up hope. Even if you do something really stupid in the most spectacular way, making bad decisions in a series, like I did. If I can survive what I did, 

    I have sat on this article for a number of years now since I first wrote it. I have since retained a law firm based in Houston, Texas, who specializes in pig, butchering scams and recovery scams. 

    If anything like this has happened to you or somebody that you know, I am here to be a beacon of hope and an advocate for empowering anyone who needs emotional support as I have been through a extreme and complex case of sophisticated financial fraud on multiple accounts mainly because I was desperate, lonely, and stupid, three things that seem to go together, but certainly shouldn’t belong together. 

    Do not be ashamed if anything like this has happened to you. You are not alone, and I can likely help connect you with somebody who may be able to help you recover from the financial, spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical affects that this may cause.

  • The Art of Performing Oral Sex on Female Partners: (For Guys Who Want to Level Up): “Becoming an Oral Pleasure Legend”

    The Art of Performing Oral Sex on Female Partners: (For Guys Who Want to Level Up): “Becoming an Oral Pleasure Legend”

    Let’s talk about cunnilingus. Yeah, eating pussy. Going downtown. Lip service. Whatever you wanna call it, if you’re gonna do it, you better do it right. And not just “good enough to get to the main event,” but so good that your partner can’t walk straight after and smiles every time they think about your face. We’re talking being remembered for a skill that many men claim to be great at and making “your partner” so punch drink with pleasure that she needs some time to bask in the afterglow after multiple, mind blowing orgasms. She can’t think straight but she’ll remember you for how you made her feel… hard to beat that.

    Here’s the truth, my fellow pleasure-givers: great oral sex is not just about technique—it’s about tuning in, being present in the moment, and paying attention to important cues. So, let’s break down how to take your oral game from “decent” to “damn, that was legendary.”

    1. Foreplay Starts Before the Tongue

    This isn’t NASCAR—you don’t just drive fast and hope for the best. Slow. It. Down. 

    Warm things up with kisses, whispers, eye contact, and maybe a little tease. This is the intimacy that so many women crave, and so many folks miss. Caress her thighs, trace circles with your fingertips, breathe just above her skin—build the anticipation. You don’t need to be a “total tease“ but don’t go straight for the action right away. Most men forget that women are like crockpots and men are more like microwaves. We can be hard and ready to go in no time but women need to be warmed up and really be in the mental and emotional space where they feel safe and turned on by every move you make. Be subtle but confident. And realize that you’re fixing to rock her world like no one else has.

    Kiss the inside of her thighs, make her feel like this time and experience is super special and reserved just for her enjoyment. 

    Now, keep in mind, Confidence comes from patience. You’re not just giving her oral; you’re building a full-body experience that is reserved just for you and her. Let her know with every move that you’re not in a rush— and that this is the main event. If something happens, after this that involves your pleasure, that’s fine. But that is not on the table right now. It’s about her and that is where your focus should be at this point.

    One of the favorite questions that I like to ask before I start the foreplay process prior to the “main event” is, “Are you ready for this?“ A vast majority of the time the answer is going to be “yes“, and the truth is, if you follow some tips in this article, she probably could never prepare or be “ready for this”. The truth is, it doesn’t get much better than this.

    2. Communication Is Sexy

    I have heard it said many times from a very famous podcast, who happens to also be a doctorate of sex therapy, that “communication is the lubrication”. 

    So many people miss this point, regardless of their gender. The focus needs to be to create a chill vibe where she feels safe to share her preferences. Say something like, “I want to make you feel amazing—show me what gets you off.” This conversation needs to happen before things get rocking. Most of us are aware that everybody gets off a different way and we need to best understand what is needed to get them there so that will help us be better at our “oral game“. 

    One of the partners that I’ve been with likes a little bit of pain to be in the mix and nothing extreme, but she likes a little bite on her inner thighs or a pinch or anything like that to be able to fully get herself off. 

    Understanding this helps me cater whatever I’m doing to be able to increase her pleasurable experience during our time together.

    Now, this is the part of this article that I really need you to pay attention to, because most people miss this point completely, listen with your ears and your eyes and read the body language that you are experiencing. Moans, gasps, tensed muscles, hips lifting to meet your mouth—these are all green lights. Silence or stillness? That might mean it’s time to switch it up. 

    Follow the lead of your partner here. If something isn’t working, try something else. Read the pleasure language. The first time I am with a woman, and we start with oral pleasure, she always comes first, literally and figuratively. And all that exists in the universe to both of you is the experience that you’re having together. Clear her mind from any concerns and build trust in the process. Experience this like you were the only two people on this planet and nothing else matters. Looking at it like this will make this extremely intimate and meaningful for you both.

    3. The Clit Is Queen—But Treat Her Right

    Yes, the clitoris is the pleasure center. But don’t just dive in like a starving man at a buffet. That’s how amateurs roll and I’m not writing this for amateurs. It is “A-GAME Time“. 

    Now, Pay attention here. 

    Start with soft, slow licks—imagine you’re painting gentle strokes with your tongue. Get to know her rhythm, her reactions. Let her body guide you. Put some variety in the mix and don’t forget to kiss her in the general vicinity of her genitals in this mix.

    And, for goodness sake’s, don’t go full tongue tornado unless that’s what she clearly wants. Many women prefer indirect stimulation at first. Use your lips, your breath, even your nose. Be creative, be attentive, and never underestimate the power of a well-timed pause. Think about music for a moment. As a classically and contemporarily trained musician, it’s not playing the notes, but it’s a space between the notes that really count. Take for instance, Blues music, and the meaning and significance of why each note is played and the meaning that it conveys. That might be a deep thought for this article but it is the space between the lines that so many people miss.

    4. Fingers + Mouth = The Holy Combo

    While your tongue is doing the talking, let your fingers join the conversation. But don’t just poke and hope—start slow, with one finger, and match your motion to the rhythm of your tongue. Unless specifically requested, finger should not be introduced until things are well into action as far as the pleasure mode goes. When you insert one or two fingers, Curving upward toward the G-spot while you’re gently licking the clit, you will be able to read your partner and figure out what’s working and what can work better for her. This isn’t about you, this is about her and the experience that you were giving her. It’s not a destination, it’s very much a journey but now you’re playing on “expert mode”.

    I had one partner within the last year communicate to me that would pleasured her the most was to be soft on the outside and hard on the inside with an oral play as well as with intercourse. This was a lesson that will apply to a lot of women, but certainly not all. 

    Communication here is gold—ask if she wants more pressure, more fingers, or a different pace. “Give her the mic” without making it awkward or “weird“.

    5. Position Matters (And Not Just Hers)

    Want a pro tip? Lying flat between her legs is fine, but there are angles that make things better for both of you. Try lying on your side between her legs, or kneeling while she’s on the edge of the bed. Even having her ride your face (yes, you heard me) can be a game-changer.

    A “leg wedge pillow“ or “bed wedge pillow“ can help you both with being comfortable and experiencing maximum pleasure in both giving and receiving.

    Let her find her sweet spot and ride the rhythm. And don’t be afraid to adjust your position to avoid neck strain— because oral pleasure heroes need healthy spines too.

    6. Talk Dirty—But Keep It Real

    A well-placed moan, growl, or dirty whisper can send shivers down her spine. Tell her how good she tastes, how sexy she looks, how much you love pleasing her. Make it authentic. Make it primal. Make her feel worshipped, not just licked.

    One tip here that I’ve noticed that has increased my partner‘s pleasure is for you, as the giver, to moan or otherwise express how much you were enjoying this, even if it’s nonverbal. This is an emotional process for a woman, and you conveying that you are receiving pleasure from pleasuring her, will typically improve the situation for both of you. She will want you more when she feels that you are enjoying this experience in some way like she is, even when her motor is running, and she’s the one that is receiving all that you give. When you can convey enjoyment of the process of licking her and making her orgasm, this all compliments, this part of the experience.

    I have one partner with pretty large labia, and I love this because it gives me something that I can suck on or lick or otherwise pleasure even further than a woman with recessed labia. The first time I was with this partner, she was very nervous about me going down on her because she had reservations and was very self-conscious about how large her labia were. Once I conveyed to her that I enjoy large labia, and that I would give her the best pleasure that I possibly could, that built trust and she had some amazing orgasms that followed that after she let go of her fear of not being accepted or loved. Remember, women need to feel safe to be able to be turned on. 

    7. It’s Not a Race—It’s a Journey

    She might not orgasm the first time. Or she might need multiple peaks to get there. Either way, keep your ego in check. This is about her pleasure, not your performance. Be patient, stay present, and let the connection build naturally.

    And if she does cum? Don’t pull away too soon. That post-orgasmic hypersensitivity can be exquisite if handled gently. Lick softer, kiss slower, ride that wave with her. Move with her hip gyrations and follow her through the peak of climax until she gives the verbal or non-verbal queue that she wants you to pull back.

    Before and during this process, if you can, hold both of her hands with both of your hands. This creates an even deeper emotional experience for both of you living in the moment and staying connected like this experience is the present moment. All that is. All that matters. No distractions. Just you and her. That’s all that matters in the moment. 

    One of the key things that I do after I get a “stop” or “pause” hand gesture is something that I have seen. Very few men do in person or on a any kind of erotic film. When I’m getting ready to teach, here is very intimate and will likely make her very safe. 

    Take your dominant hand and and cover her genitals with it. Do this for at least 30 seconds. Maybe more. Your mileage may vary. Most women that I’ve been with don’t understand why I do this, but they tell me in the afterglow stage that they understand why I do it. I believe that MOST men miss this, so please pay attention. 

    I learned this gesture from a renowned sex therapist through one of his video series that I purchased, and it works every time with helping my partner, feel safe and protected after an incredible, mind blowing orgasm. 

    As she recovers, she will begin to realize with your hand there for even a short period of time that you are protecting the most sacred area of her body. This is going to likely lead to other great things during the rest of your quality time together in the bedroom. 

    Again, when she feels safe and feels protected by you in an otherwise potentially vulnerable state, the sky is the limit on her respecting you and wanting to return the favor. This might involve a blow job for you or a 69 that would please both of you at the same time, or any number of other things that could happen as a result.

    Now, if she is so worn out from having four orgasms or has lost count of the amount of orgasms that she had because you did such a great job, she may be a bit of a “wet noodle” at this point”. She may need some time  and space to gather her mental and physical faculties after the fantastic job that you just did with pleasuring her orally. 

    Be patient with this. Don’t think with your balls and your dick. What she likely experienced was very emotional, very intense, and maybe something that she hasn’t experienced like this before. 

    Give her “agency” and give her both the time and space that she needs to recover from all this great fun. Part of what I do in this case is not worry about me getting a blowjob or anything sexual having to do with me. I will do something that a lot of guys don’t do, and hold her, hug her, make her feel important and closer. 

    Even if you are in a non-monogamous relationship, that is still your special time with this partner and it’s an important connection to foster.

    So chill with her, make her feel like she is the focal point of everything you are for that moment or for the moments that proceed that. You really don’t know what’s going to happen next, but for the first part of your sexual adventure, being concentrated on her pleasure or her having multiple orgasms will go a long way when it comes to it being your turn and for her feeling emotionally safe and connected with you in giving you reciprocation. 

    Being great at oral sex isn’t about having a magic tongue. It’s about paying attention, loving the experience, and treating your partner’s pleasure as your priority. 

    Every vulva is different. Every woman has her own preferences. The key is to approach each time in this realm of possibilities like a beautifully messy, wildly erotic exploration.

    I encourage you to think of this exploration in improving your female oral pleasure skills with your partner, for the intimacy, the connection, and the meaningful satisfaction of knowing you were the one who made her toes curl. You might become a hero to her in a way that she never thought possible. 

    If you take the time to hone in on your partner’s preferences and responses to what you are doing with her when you are practicing your skills, you will both have a happier and more enjoyable experience.

    For the sapiosexual and demisexual folks like mine, this is a very emotional part of sexual play and should be treated with a respected deserves. 

    Do not rush, watch and listen well to verbal and physical cues, and respond accordingly.

    The most memorable time when I realized that I was capable of incredibly satisfying a woman with oral sex was when I made a partner cum so many times from orgasms that we soaked the entire waterproof bedspread on a king size bed and she could hardly form words because she was in such a blissful afterglow. Trust me, she will never look at you the same again. 

    I hope you picked up at least a couple of tips from this article which can help you in your sexual journey and thank you all so much for your support.